Pedestrian storytelling meets twists that defy ‘Star Wars’ canon

The Force is far from strong with the Disney+ series “The Acolyte.”

Neither horrible nor binge-worthy, the series won’t make people forget “The Mandalorian,” let alone any classic “Star Wars” tales.

The Acolyte | Official Trailer | Disney+

The setting is roughly 100 years before the events of “The Phantom Menace.” The Jedi Council is alive and well, training young Padawans and learning hard truths about some alum.

Namely, Osha (Amandla Stenberg), who in the show’s opening moments does a very bad thing. That’s all we can say thanks to the Emperor … we mean Disney’s legal team!

Appearances may be deceiving, but it doesn’t prevent Osha from feeling the wrath of the Jedi Council. That includes Sol (“Squid Game” standout Lee Jung-jae), the only character to capture the gravitas of the Jedi order.

Another figure comes close but isn’t around long enough to count.

Is Osha a criminal? If not, can she clear her name before the Council declares her guilty?

“The Acolyte” dispenses with any talk of Skywalkers, past or present. The focus is on the Jedi way of life, which it turns out is rather dull. So is the writing in the first three episodes. Showrunner Leslye Headland (co-creator, “Russian Doll”) has a sprawling canvas on which to create, but so far it’s a paint-by-numbers affair.

Disney+’s “Andor” delved into the geopolitical workings behind the saga. Everything in “The Acolyte,” at least from the jump, is surface-level deep.

Sometimes, it’s not even that.

Star Wars: The Acolyte – Exclusive Clip (2024) Lee Jung-jae, Amandla Stenberg

A key mystery is solved toward the end of episode one … robbing the series of an early boost. Every time something bubbles up it’s quickly buffed smooth.

It’s anti-tension.

The third episode offers more thematic weight, and longtime fans better buckle in. It’s the most overtly feminist part of the series and likely to draw old-school fans’ wrath for canon-shattering fodder.

“Acolyte’s” “Star Wars” trappings give viewers a false sense of security.

Production values make fine use of the saga’s visual texture, from colorful extras to that steampunk mix of new and old technology. We also get the signature “Star Wars” screen wipes plus musical cues that evoke composer John Williams’ inimitable sound.

Instead of a droid or R2D2 type we get Pip, who serves a similar service but looks like a “Star Trek” tricorder. Not bad…

It’s all an imitation, an attempt to recreate a fabled universe and the passion it once stoked. And when someone says, “I got a bad feeling about this” it’s enough to make a Comic-Con regular weep.

We know what Jedis can do, but occasionally “The Acolyte” pretends we don’t. A heroic gesture is treated with great suspense when even a casual fan knows how easy it was to pull the feat off.

This is Disney’s “Star Wars,” so the show’s diverse casting is as extreme as any recent TV commercial. It’s … distracting in its aggressive sense of purpose.

There’s more. A one-line comment tells us a key figure has two moms. Later, 21st century pronouns make themselves known, according to Film Threat’s Alan Ng. Reminder: We’re still in a galaxy far, far away but they know our 2024 culture rather well, no?

Disney CEO Bob “calm the noise on the culture war front” Iger would like a word with “The Acolyte.”

Themes of cultural oppression rise up in episode three. It’s about power and how various communities use it. How far will that narrative thread be pulled?

One morally twisted turn. A heroic character lets an accused criminal go sans regret. Defund the Intergalactic Police?

Another? Granting children the right to control their destiny without parental consent. Do we even need to connect those dots in 2024?

“The Acolyte” moves at an agreeable pace, but there’s precious little “why” behind the narrative so far. Yay, diversity! Woo-hoo! Female characters aplenty! Bechdel Test … nailed! That feminist streak gets a workout. It’s also where Comic-Con nation may shriek the loudest.

Disney should be accustomed to that by now, but it least the sequences feel fresh to the franchise.

For a while.

That episode loses control mid-story. The ensuing plot pivots make little sense beyond getting to where the storytellers need us to go. To label it clunky is being kind.

“The Acolyte” could find its legs, eventually. The bigger threat looming over the story might be worth the wait, and the writing could mature with more time.

How many people will stick around to see is another question.