Princess Kate’s brother, James Middleton, has shed new light on the personal issues that the royal was facing around the time that Meghan Markle joined the British royal family, as he has bravely discussed his battle with depression and suicidal thoughts in his memoir.
In his book Meet Ella: The Dog Who Saved My Life, Middleton has revealed in detail how the deaths of family pets in the fall of 2016 contributed to a downward spiral of his mental health, sparking concern from his family.
He told readers he acknowledged at the time that, though things appeared externally perfect, he was deeply unhappy, so much so that in 2017 he considered ending his own life.
Middleton’s sisters, Princess Kate and Pippa Matthews, were not made aware of the extent of their brother’s mental health crisis until they attended a group therapy session in early 2018, after he had sought professional help.
This timeline adds new insight into the personal challenges facing Kate between 2016 and 2018, the same period of time that Meghan Markle was joining the royal family.
Meghan began dating Harry in the summer of 2016, and they announced their engagement in the fall of 2017, a period in which Middleton writes he was experiencing his darkest periods of his depression.
It comes as public focus on Kate’s relationship with Meghan and how she welcomed her new sister-in-law into the royal family has grown since the Sussexes split from the monarchy in 2020.
In a 2021 interview with Oprah Winfrey, Meghan confirmed speculation that her relationship with Kate was strained and that in May 2018 the princess had made her cry before the royal wedding.
In his 2023 memoir, Spare, Prince Harry expressed disappointment that his wife and sister-in-law didn’t appear to get along as well as he’d hoped, and that a number of tensions built up between them.
Recounting his experiences in 2017, around the time Meghan was being introduced to family members prior to her engagement, Middleton told memoir readers that at points he felt so low that he left both of his sisters deeply concerned as he stopped answering their messages and canceled plans to see them.
“I can’t respond to the simplest message, so I don’t open my emails. I can’t communicate even with those I love best, my family and close friends,” he said of his experiences at the time.
“Their anxious texts grow more insistent by the day, yet I cannot muster the energy even to read them. I know how much my parents and my sisters love me and are desperate to help me. But their messages go unanswered as I sink into a mire of despair.”
Middleton said that he was grateful for Prince William and Kate’s work with mental health charities, which meant they were able to act as a go-between with his parents to help understand what was happening; however, this did not alleviate his suffering.
“My mind constantly wanders. I start to consider how I can end my life,” he wrote. “Walking in front of a train might be quickest. Or disappearing into remote woodland and cutting my wrists. These suicidal thoughts possess me.”
Toward the end of 2017, he told readers, he reached out to a medical professional for help and began seeing a therapist who diagnosed him with clinical depression and attention deficit disorder.
This led to him holding a group therapy session with his sisters, during which he said the princess was supportive and asked “pertinent questions.”
“She understands so much. I’m overwhelmed. I feel such gratitude and admiration for her, for her knowledge and compassion,” he said.
In the book, Middleton tells readers that both of his sisters remained a close support network for him throughout his mental health struggles, leading to his diagnosis with clinical depression and attention deficit disorder.
They encouraged him to take holidays, as well as checking in on him and offering him places to stay.
Middleton credited his late dog Ella with truly helping him make it through this challenging period, and it is in her honor that he has named his new memoir.
Kate’s relationship with Meghan continues as a subject of public fascination, though Kate has not openly discussed the duchess or the claims made since she and Prince Harry split from the monarchy.
If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988, text “988” to the Crisis Text Line at 741741 or go to 988lifeline.org.
“Meet Ella: The Dog Who Saved My Life” by James Middleton is published in the United States by Pegasus Books from September 26.
